What to Do When a Loved One Passes Away
A Complete Step-by-Step Guide for Montreal Families
Losing a loved one is one of the most disorienting experiences a person can go through. In the hours and days right after a death, families are asked to make important decisions, legal, logistical and deeply personal, at the very moment when clear thinking seems impossible. Grief has a way of making the simplest tasks feel monumental and the most important ones feel completely out of reach.
At North Star Funeral Services, we have walked alongside hundreds of Montreal families through this same experience. We know that what you need in these moments is not a cold checklist, but a clear and compassionate path that tells you what needs to happen and when, and reassures you that you don't have to figure everything out alone.
This guide is meant to be a complete resource for families in the Greater Montreal area, covering the whole journey: from the first phone calls made in the hours after a death, to the memorial ceremony, and on to the weeks and months that follow as an estate is settled and life slowly takes on a new shape. We wrote it in plain language, with Quebec's own legal and administrative context in mind, because families here face a set of requirements that differs from those in other Canadian provinces.
Read this guide at your own pace. Bookmark it. Share it with the family members who are helping you carry this weight. Come back to it as needed. And whenever you have questions, remember that our team at North Star Funeral Services is available at any time, not only to take care of the funeral arrangements, but also to support you through each step ahead.
Part One: In the First Hours
The hours right after a death are often the most confusing. Here is what needs to happen, and how to approach each step with as much calm as the circumstances allow.
Step 1: Have the death pronounced and contact the appropriate authorities
The very first thing that must happen, before the funeral home is contacted, before family members are notified, before any decision is made, is the official pronouncement of death by a health professional. In Quebec, this is a legal requirement, and the steps to follow depend on where and how the death occurred.
If the death occurred in a hospital, a palliative care facility or a long-term care centre, you are already in the hands of professionals who handle this process regularly. A physician or nurse practitioner on site will pronounce the death, complete the required medical certificate and direct you to the next steps. There is no need to call 911. The facility usually has a social worker or patient liaison to support your family in the immediate aftermath. Take the time you need with your loved one before the body is moved. Most facilities will accommodate this request, and nothing should rush you.
If the death occurred at home after an expected illness, for example under a palliative care plan for a terminal condition, contact the palliative care team or your loved one's attending physician as soon as you feel ready. In Quebec, a physician or an authorized nurse practitioner must come to pronounce the death before the body can be transferred to a funeral home. Many palliative care programs in Montreal, including those coordinated by the CIUSSS networks and private palliative care residences, have protocols designed specifically for deaths at home. A nurse may already be part of the regular care team and be able to handle the pronouncement efficiently. If you are unsure whom to contact, call the palliative care coordinator linked to your loved one's care plan; they will guide you through the next steps.
If the death is sudden, unexpected, or the cause is unknown, call 911 immediately. Emergency responders, police and paramedics, will come to the scene. A coroner may be assigned to investigate, especially if the death was accidental, happened in unusual circumstances or if the person had not recently been seen by a doctor. It is important to understand that a coroner's involvement is a standard legal requirement under Quebec's Act respecting the determination of the causes and circumstances of death; it implies no fault or wrongdoing on the part of the family. The coroner's staff are used to supporting grieving families with compassion and will guide you through the steps, including when the body can be released to a funeral home.
Do not try to move the body before the appropriate authorities have intervened, pronounced the death and released it to a licensed funeral home. This is both a legal requirement and a practical necessity.
Step 2: Contact a funeral home
Once the death has been officially pronounced and the proper documentation is under way, one of the most important calls you will make is to a funeral home. In Quebec, a licensed funeral director must be involved in transporting and preparing the deceased. This is not something families can arrange on their own, nor something that should wait.
At North Star Funeral Services, we keep a line open 24 hours a day precisely because death keeps no schedule. When you call us, whether it is three in the afternoon or three in the morning, a caring, professional member of our team will answer. We will ask a few gentle questions to understand the situation and your needs, then send a team to transport your loved one with dignity, discretion and care.
When you make this call, no decisions need to be made. You don't need to know whether you want burial or cremation, whether there will be a visitation or a ceremony, or what kind of service you have in mind. The only purpose of this call is to make sure your loved one is in professional hands, while you take the time you need to breathe, gather your family and begin to take in what has happened.
We will then set a time, at your convenience, to sit down together and talk about everything that follows.
Step 3: Notify immediate family and close friends
Before news of the death spreads through other channels, especially social media, which tends to get ahead of everyone's intentions, take the time to personally tell the people who were closest to your loved one. Immediate family first, then close friends and anyone who would be hurt to hear the news from someone other than you.
These calls and messages are hard to make. There is no perfect way to share news like this, and no script that makes it easier. A simple, direct and honest message is always enough: "I'm calling to tell you that [first name] passed away [this morning / last night / today]. We are all together and we will get back to you soon about the arrangements." That is truly all that needs to be said in that first moment.
If making these calls feels overwhelming, and it often does, it is perfectly appropriate to ask a trusted friend or another family member to help. You can split the list, or choose one person as the family's main point of contact while the others focus on supporting one another.
Avoid posting anything on social media until you are sure everyone close to your loved one has been told personally. Once the news is online, it travels fast and cannot be taken back.
Part Two: In the First 24 to 48 Hours
Once the most immediate steps are done, your loved one is in our care and the people closest to them have been told, you can start on the next layer of decisions and tasks. None of these steps has to happen in the first hours. Take a breath. Rest if you can. Eat something. Then, when you are ready, approach the next steps with the support of your family and our team.
Step 4: Gather important documents
You will need a number of important documents over the coming days and weeks, for the funeral arrangements, for the declaration of death and for the legal and financial steps that follow. Start gathering them as soon as you can, but don't let this task overwhelm you. Make a list, share the search among family members if possible, and know that most of these documents can be found even if they are not immediately at hand.
The main documents to locate include the deceased's Quebec health insurance card, their social insurance number (on the SIN card or a recent tax return), birth certificate, Canadian citizenship or permanent residence documents if applicable, marriage or civil union certificate, divorce judgment or separation agreement if applicable, and the most recent will. Also look for any funeral pre-arrangement documents, life insurance policies, pension or retirement statements, banking information, and documents for any real estate, vehicles or investments.
In Quebec, wills are often notarized and registered with the Chambre des notaires du Québec or the Barreau du Québec. If you don't know whether a will exists or where to find it, you can request a will search from the Chambre des notaires or the Barreau; the search can be done quickly and will confirm whether a registered will is on file and who holds it.
The notary who holds the will is a valuable contact to make early. They can explain the scope of the estate, the role of the liquidator and the general process of settling an estate under Quebec civil law.
Step 5: Check whether a funeral pre-arrangement exists
Before making any decision about the funeral arrangements, it is essential to find out whether your loved one had a funeral pre-arrangement. In Quebec, funeral pre-arrangements are overseen by the Office de la protection du consommateur (OPC), and many Quebecers, especially in older age groups, have pre-arranged and prepaid their funeral with a licensed funeral home.
A pre-arrangement sets out the kind of ceremony the person wanted, whether they preferred burial or cremation, and other personal details and preferences they wanted respected. Following the pre-arrangement is not only a meaningful way to honour your loved one's wishes; in Quebec, it is a legal obligation when a funded plan exists. It also lifts the weight of many difficult decisions at an already painful time.
If you suspect a pre-arrangement exists but cannot find the paperwork, check with the deceased's notary or bank, or contact us directly at North Star Funeral Services. We can help you look for any pre-arrangement registered with our funeral home or with another provider.
Step 6: Choose between burial and cremation
If no pre-arrangement states a preference, this is usually the first major decision a family makes together. In Quebec, cremation is now by far the most common choice, with provincial rates above 80%. However, this decision should never be based only on what is usual or convenient; it is a deeply personal choice that should reflect the values, beliefs, cultural background and stated or implied wishes of the person who died.
For families with strong ties to the Catholic faith, burial in consecrated ground may be an important priority. The Catholic Church allows cremation but asks that the ashes be treated with the same respect as the body, and that they be buried rather than scattered or divided. For Jewish families, the traditions of prompt burial and keeping the body whole are central, and cremation is generally not compatible with Orthodox or Conservative practice, although approaches vary across the spectrum of Jewish observance. For families from other religious and cultural traditions, Greek Orthodox, Muslim, Hindu, Protestant or secular, our team will take the time to understand your particular traditions and make sure our approach respects those values.
It is also important to understand that burial and cremation are separate questions from the kind of memorial ceremony you will hold. A full visitation and funeral ceremony can take place before cremation. Ashes can be buried in a cemetery, kept at home in an urn, scattered in a meaningful place with the proper permissions, or shared among family members. A burial can be preceded by a ceremony at the funeral home, a religious service at a place of worship, or both. The possibilities are wide, and our team will guide you through each of them, without pressure or judgment.
Step 7: Plan the memorial ceremony
Working with a funeral director at North Star Funeral Services, you will begin preparing the memorial ceremony: the gathering that brings your community together to honour your loved one's life and support one another in grief.
A memorial ceremony can take many forms, and the right one is simply the one that feels most true to the person who died and most meaningful to those who will attend.
A traditional funeral ceremony usually includes a visitation, often held the evening before the funeral or the morning of the ceremony, followed by a formal service, which can take place in a funeral home chapel, a place of worship or another venue. For Catholic families, this will usually include a funeral Mass celebrated by a priest at the family parish. For families of other faiths, equivalent ceremonies can be arranged with clergy or community leaders. For non-religious families, a civil ceremony can be led by a secular officiant who helps design a personal, thoughtful and meaningful ceremony without religious content.
A celebration of life is a less formal alternative, or addition, to a traditional ceremony. Our guide to creating meaningful memorials explores personalization options in detail. These gatherings tend to be warmer and more personal in tone, often featuring photographs, music, food and stories that reflect who the person truly was. They can be held a few days or even a few weeks after the death, giving families more time to plan a moment that truly reflects them. In Montreal, celebrations of life have been held in private homes, restaurants in the Old Port and the Plateau-Mont-Royal, community halls in Saint-Laurent and Côte-des-Neiges, and waterfront spots on Lac des Deux Montagnes, wherever the personal meaning was strongest.
A graveside ceremony is a simpler option, where a short ceremony is held at the burial site. It can stand alone or follow a ceremony held elsewhere.
Whatever format you choose, several elements deserve careful thought. Music is one of the most emotionally powerful, whether it is hymns sung at the parish, the classic Quebec folk songs your loved one grew up with, the jazz records they collected for decades, or a contemporary piece that held special meaning. Readings from Scripture, poetry, literature or the deceased's own writing give the ceremony shape and texture. Eulogies and personal tributes from family members and friends are often among the most memorable moments of any service. And for Montreal's many bilingual families, language matters deeply: a ceremony with participation in both French and English makes sure everyone present feels included in the farewell.
Our funeral directors have the experience to help families plan every element of a meaningful memorial ceremony, and we are proud to offer fully bilingual services that reflect the reality of life in this city.
Part Three: During the First Week
Step 8: Declare the death to the Directeur de l'état civil
In Quebec, every death must be officially declared to the Directeur de l'état civil (DEC), the provincial government body responsible for vital statistics, including births, marriages, civil unions and deaths. This declaration must be made within the time set by law, and it is the basis for issuing official death certificates.
At North Star Funeral Services, we take care of the declaration of death on behalf of the families we serve. We prepare and send the required declaration to the DEC, based on the attestation of death completed by the physician or nurse practitioner and the personal information provided by the family. This is one of the administrative steps we are glad to handle so you can put your energy into your loved ones.
Once the death is registered, the DEC will issue an act of death, from which certified copies of the death certificate can be obtained. We strongly recommend requesting at least eight to ten certified copies from the start. You will need them for many of the administrative steps ahead, notifying financial institutions, insurers, pension plans and government agencies, and getting more copies later adds delays and complexity to an already demanding situation.
Step 9: Notify federal and provincial government agencies
Several government agencies need to be notified of the death, and some benefits and payments must be stopped to avoid overpayments that might have to be paid back later. This step may feel bureaucratic, but it matters and should be completed in the first week if possible.
At the federal level, Service Canada should be your first call. It administers the Canada Pension Plan (CPP), Old Age Security (OAS) and the Guaranteed Income Supplement (GIS), and can stop recurring payments, provide information on the CPP death benefit, a one-time payment of up to $2,500 available to the estate of eligible CPP contributors, and help surviving spouses or common-law partners apply for a CPP survivor's pension. Service Canada offers a death notification service that lets you notify several federal departments at once with a single contact, which can save families considerable time and effort.
At the provincial level, Retraite Québec administers the Québec Pension Plan (QPP), Quebec's equivalent of the CPP, as well as survivors' benefits under the Québec Pension Plan. Contact Retraite Québec to report the death, stop any QPP retirement pension the deceased was receiving, and ask about survivors' benefits that may be available to a spouse, common-law partner or dependent children.
The Canada Revenue Agency (CRA) should also be notified, especially if the deceased was receiving benefits such as the GST/HST credit or the Canada Carbon Rebate. Notice can be given by phone or in writing, and the CRA will flag the file and provide guidance on the requirements for the final tax return. Likewise, Revenu Québec should be notified of the death and will provide guidance on provincial tax obligations.
If your loved one was a veteran or receiving benefits from Veterans Affairs Canada, contact that department as well. Veterans Affairs Canada has dedicated case managers who help families through the notification process and explain the survivors' benefits that may be available.
Step 10: Notify financial institutions
Contact each financial institution where your loved one held accounts, banks, credit unions, investment firms, mortgage lenders and registered accounts such as RRSPs, RRIFs or TFSAs, to report the death and begin managing the estate's finances. In Quebec, accounts held in the deceased's name alone will generally be frozen once the institution is notified, with access reserved for the liquidator of the estate. Joint accounts may continue to operate normally, depending on how they are set up.
Always bring a certified copy of the death certificate when dealing with financial institutions. Most will also ask for a copy of the will or a document confirming who the appointed liquidator is before sharing account details or taking any other action.
One important early priority is to identify any life insurance policies the deceased held. Life insurance benefits are generally paid directly to the named beneficiaries and are not part of the estate, which means they are often available relatively quickly, even before the estate is fully settled. Contact each insurer as soon as possible to file a claim and understand the expected payment timeline.
If the deceased had debts, a mortgage, a car loan, credit card balances, personal lines of credit, these become obligations of the estate. Creditors must be paid out of the estate's assets before anything is distributed to the heirs. The liquidator of the estate, working with a notary, will handle this process in an orderly way.
Step 11: Cancel or transfer services and subscriptions
Beyond government agencies and financial institutions, there is a whole range of notifications and cancellations to handle in the first two weeks. The list will vary depending on the deceased's situation, but usually includes the following.
The Société de l'assurance automobile du Québec (SAAQ) should be notified to cancel the deceased's driver's licence and, if applicable, the vehicle registration. The RAMQ health insurance card should be returned. Any private health or dental insurance plan should be cancelled and final claims submitted. Professional associations, unions or fraternal organizations the deceased belonged to should also be informed.
On a more personal level, think about digital accounts: email addresses, social media profiles, streaming subscriptions and online services linked to the deceased's payment information. Platforms such as Facebook allow accounts to be memorialized when a user dies, creating a space where friends and family can keep sharing memories. Some families prefer to close accounts entirely. There is no right answer, only what suits your family and what you believe your loved one would have wanted.
Going through paper mail and email over the first few weeks is often the most reliable way to spot subscriptions and automatic payments that might otherwise go unnoticed. Ask Canada Post about having mail redirected so nothing is missed.
Part Four: In the Weeks and Months That Follow
Step 12: Understand the role of the estate liquidator
Quebec is governed by a civil law system that differs significantly from the common law system used in the rest of Canada. One of the most notable differences concerns the person responsible for administering an estate. In Quebec, this person is called the liquidator, not the executor, as in Ontario, British Columbia or other common law provinces. The responsibilities are broadly similar, but the legal framework is distinct and somewhat more formal in its requirements.
The liquidator is usually named in the will. Their main responsibilities include: drawing up a complete inventory of all the deceased's assets and debts, publishing a notice of closure of inventory in a local newspaper and in the Register of personal and movable real rights as required by law, paying all outstanding debts out of the estate's assets, filing the deceased's final federal and provincial tax returns, and distributing what remains to the heirs according to the will or, if there is no will, according to the Civil Code of Québec.
If the deceased left no will, a situation known in Quebec law as dying intestate, the estate is distributed according to the order of heirs set out in the Civil Code. In that case, the heirs must agree among themselves on who will act as liquidator or, if they disagree, a court may have to appoint one.
Given the legal complexity of Quebec succession law, we strongly recommend that the liquidator work with a notary who specializes in estate administration from the start. A notary can make sure all legal obligations are met in the right order, protect the liquidator from personal liability for the estate's debts, and help manage any disputes that may arise between heirs. This is not a luxury; it is real protection for everyone involved.
Step 13: File the deceased's final tax returns
Among the liquidator's most important obligations is filing a final tax return for the deceased, both federally with the CRA and provincially with Revenu Québec. This return covers all income earned from January 1 of the year of death up to the date of death itself.
Depending on the nature of the deceased's income and assets, additional returns may be required. For example, a rights or things return covers certain types of income that were owed to the deceased on the date of death but had not yet been received, such as unpaid salary, rent arrears or dividends declared but not yet paid. In some circumstances, filing additional returns can lower the estate's overall tax bill, and a tax professional or notary can assess whether this applies to your situation.
All taxes owing must be paid before the estate can be fully distributed to the heirs. Any refund due will be paid to the estate. Once the CRA and Revenu Québec are satisfied that all tax obligations have been met, they will issue a clearance certificate, a document that formally protects the liquidator from personal liability for the deceased's unpaid taxes. Distributing the estate before receiving this certificate is strongly discouraged.
The deadline for the final return generally depends on when in the year the death occurred. If the death took place between January 1 and October 31, the return is generally due by April 30 of the following year. If the death occurred between November 1 and December 31, the return is generally due six months after the date of death. A tax professional or notary will confirm the exact deadlines that apply to your situation.
Step 14: Distribute the estate
Once all debts are paid, all tax obligations settled, the clearance certificate obtained and all other legal formalities completed, the liquidator can distribute the remaining assets of the estate to the heirs, as set out in the will or, if there is no will, according to Quebec succession law.
In practice, settling an estate can take anywhere from several months to well over a year, depending on the complexity of the assets, the number of heirs, whether there are disputes and how efficiently the administrative and legal steps are carried out. Real estate, investment accounts and business interests all add complexity. Having an experienced notary involved from the start makes an enormous difference in keeping the process moving and protecting everyone involved.
Part Five: Taking Care of Yourself and Your Family
It would be easy to read a guide like this one and come away with the impression that grief is basically an administrative problem to be solved, a series of tasks to complete before life can resume. We want to be clear: it is not. The steps described in this guide are important, and doing them well will protect your family and honour your loved one's legacy. But they are not more important than your well-being, or the well-being of the people around you who are also grieving.
Understanding how grief works
Grief is not a linear process, and it follows no neat timetable. In the weeks and months after a loss, many people go through a shifting, unpredictable range of emotions: deep sadness, numbness, anger, guilt, relief, confusion, and even unexpected moments of laughter or lightness. All of these reactions are normal. None of them is wrong. Grief is as unique as the relationship that was lost.
Many people find that the hardest stage of grief does not come right after the death, when community support is usually strongest and the activity of making arrangements provides some structure, but in the weeks and months that follow, when the world around them has moved on and the person's absence begins to sink in more deeply. Birthdays, holidays and ordinary moments once shared can bring waves of grief as sharp and intense as in the very first days of the loss.
Be patient with yourself. Let grief move through your heart at its own pace. Resist the cultural pressure, often well-meant but rarely helpful, to "move on" or "get back to normal" on someone else's schedule.
Leaning on your community in Montreal
Montreal is a city of closely knit communities, and one of the greatest gifts available to grieving families here is the support of the networks they belong to. Whether your family's community gathers around a parish in Ahuntsic or Rosemont, a synagogue in Côte-Saint-Luc, a mosque in Saint-Laurent, a cultural association in Saint-Michel, a community centre in Côte-des-Neiges, or simply the neighbours and longtime friends who have been part of your life for years, these relationships are a resource in grief. Let people help you. Accept the meals, the company, the offers to watch the children or run an errand. The people who care about you often want very much to do something useful in the face of a loss they cannot fix. Letting them contribute is a gift to everyone involved.
Recognizing when professional support is needed
There are times when grief benefits from, or truly requires, professional support, and there is no weakness in recognizing that this point has been reached. If, over a long period, you have trouble functioning day to day, going to work, caring for children or other dependants, or taking care of your own basic needs, it may be time to see a counsellor or therapist who specializes in grief. If you, or someone you love, feel ongoing hopelessness, significant isolation or thoughts of self-harm, please seek professional help without delay.
Montreal is fortunate to have a wide range of grief support resources, including individual bereavement counsellors, group support programs offered by hospitals and community organizations, and services offered by local health networks (the CIUSSS system), cultural organizations and faith communities. These services are available in French and English, and increasingly in a range of other languages that reflect the city's growing diversity.
At North Star Funeral Services, we keep an active network of trusted grief support resources across the Greater Montreal area, and we are glad to help connect you or a family member with the right support. Aftercare is something we take seriously: our commitment to you does not end when the ceremony is over.
Supporting children through grief
If there are children in your family who are grieving, grandchildren, children, younger siblings or young close friends, their needs deserve deliberate, thoughtful attention. Children often grieve differently from adults. They may seem to regain their balance quickly, then be overcome by grief again at unexpected moments. They may ask very direct, and sometimes surprising, questions about death and about what happened to the person they loved. They may express their grief through changes in behaviour, withdrawal, difficulties at school or physical complaints rather than visible sadness.
Research consistently shows that children who are included in mourning rituals, who are allowed to attend the funeral or memorial ceremony with proper preparation and the support of a trusted adult, generally move through grief in a healthier way over the long term than those who are kept away. Consider including children in age-appropriate ways: asking them to make a drawing to place with the deceased, giving them a small, meaningful role in the ceremony, or simply explaining honestly and gently what the ceremony will involve, what they might see, and that it is okay to feel whatever they feel.
Choosing a trusted adult, someone who is not busy with the ceremony itself, whose only responsibility is to look after the child's needs and comfort during the gathering, can make an enormous difference for young guests.
If a child in your family is having serious difficulties, lasting changes in mood, behaviour or school performance, a school psychologist, family therapist or child psychologist who specializes in grief can offer valuable support. Our article on supporting children through loss offers more guidance.
How North Star Funeral Services Supports You at Every Step
We founded North Star Funeral Services because we believe Montreal families deserve a funeral home that truly understands this city: its languages, its cultures, its traditions and its grief. We are not a national chain operating from a distance. We are part of this community, and we take that responsibility to heart.
From the moment you call us, our team is by your side. We transport your loved one with care and dignity. We guide you through every decision, from burial or cremation to the format and personal details of the memorial ceremony, without pressure or judgment. We take care of the declaration of death with the Directeur de l'état civil on your behalf. We connect you with notaries, grief counsellors and community resources. And we remain available long after the ceremony ends, because we understand that the need for support does not end when the flowers are put away.
We offer fully bilingual services in French and English, and we have extensive experience supporting families from a wide range of cultural, religious and language traditions: Catholic and Protestant, Jewish and Muslim, Greek Orthodox and secular, French-speaking and English-speaking, longtime Montrealers and newcomers alike. Whatever your family's background and your loved one's traditions, you will be welcomed with respect, warmth and real expertise.
We also offer compassionate, no-pressure pre-planning consultations for those who want to spare their family the burden of making these decisions under stress. Pre-planning is one of the most loving things a person can do for those they will one day leave behind, and we are honoured to guide these conversations with the care and patience they deserve.
A Final Word
There is no perfect way to go through the loss of a loved one, and no guide, however complete, can fully prepare you for what grief truly feels like when it comes. What this guide hopes to offer is the reassurance that the practical path ahead is manageable, that you are not walking it alone, and that there are people and resources in this city ready to support you at every step.
If you are reading this in the immediate aftermath of a death and need help right now, please call North Star Funeral Services. We are here, day and night, weekdays and weekends, in French and in English, ready to guide you with compassion, professionalism and genuine care.
And if you are reading this at a calmer time, planning ahead, or supporting someone else through a loss, we hope it has been helpful. Please share this guide with anyone around you who might need it. It was written for our community, and it belongs to each and every one of you.
North Star Funeral Services proudly serves families across the Greater Montreal area, including Laval, Longueuil, the South Shore and the West Island. We are available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, in French and in English. Contact us at any time; we are always here for you.
